The Shared Losses
by Lily in Blue
Summary: Sarah and Casey ruminate together over the losses and betrayals they've both experienced during their time in Burbank.  One-shot.


**The following story takes place sometime after episode 4.15 - _Chuck vs. The CAT Squad_.**

**(Insert standard disclaimer about me not owning _Chuck_ here.)**

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**The Shared Losses**

John Casey glanced out of his apartment window and frowned, an unusual pattern of movement catching his ever-vigilant eye. He watched the courtyard with careful scrutiny, observing his teammate, Sarah Walker, strode purposefully out of her shared apartment. She approached the courtyard's exit, paused and suddenly looked very lost.

Sensing something was amiss, Casey quickly exited his apartment and intercepted his partner as she turned around to head back indoors. "Walker? What's going on?" Casey eyed his courtyard surroundings suspiciously.

Still aimless, Sarah changed direction again and moved to take a seat on the edge of the fountain in the center of the courtyard. She gave Casey a brief, vaguely sheepish smile.

"I was just going to Castle to catch up on a few things. With everything's that happened in the past few days I just fell into habit and forgot for a little while..."

Sarah's words trailed off and Casey simply raised an eyebrow in response. He wouldn't dare say it, but he was fairly sure his teammate was actually moping. She wouldn't hear a complaint from him, though. In the past year, as Walker and Bartowski grew closer personally and professionally, Casey found himself drifting further from his once partner. However, there were bonds he shared with her that Bartowski never would. Casey had lived the life of a spy the same way Sarah had, and in many ways that Chuck never did. They had both experienced the strife and loss the uglier side of the spy life generated. Chuck, on the other hand, was the most sheltered, coddled spy Casey had even seen. Casey knew. He had felt the very pain Sarah was feeling now. This was not a time to mock her, despite her moping.

Sarah absently played with the set of keys in her hands. "I can't believe I forgot." She gave a brief, mirthless chuckle.

Casey finally sat down beside Sarah on the edge of the fountain. He scowled briefly, knowing he was in the same seat that held so many episodes of feelings and angst between his teammates. However, it was his turn now. With an understanding nod, he spoke.

"I've been there, Walker."

'She wasn't even four years old yet."

"I know." He understood.

"It's such a waste. I just can't believe she's gone..."

"It'll get better," Casey offered as gently as he could muster.

"I spent so many years suspecting Zondra that I barely gave Amy a second thought." Casey thought he detected a tinge of regret over her handling of her past with the CAT squad in Sarah's tone.

"Betrayal from your team. Been there too." Casey punctuated his sentence with a small, bitter grunt as his thoughts briefly wandered to a bunker of gold in the Iranian desert.

"But to do this..." Sarah's subdued tone finally gave way to a burst of uncharacteristic frustration. "Casey..."

Casey regarded Sarah's shift in mood with a faintly surprised look before quickly restoring his stony mask.

"_She killed my car_!"

A black 2007 Porsche 911 Carrera 4S. Leather interior. All the extra toys. She was a little small for Casey's taste, but he acknowledged that she was a machine of beauty; that is until she was reduced to a flaming hunk of mutilated German-engineering by Amy and Gaez's car bomb. Sarah had few true attachments in the world, but by Casey's observation, she had often treated that car better than she treated Bartowski.

Casey nodded glumly. "1985 Ford Crown Victoria. Your boy-toy... excuse me, _fiancé_," Casey smirked as he emphasized Chuck's new role in Sarah's life, "did the same thing to me."

"He didn't mean it." Sarah smiled briefly, amused that Casey was still holding the loss of that car over Chuck's head.

Casey grunted in assent. "You know, if he hadn't gotten it into his sap-filled brain to call your old team back together, that Porsche of yours might still be in one piece. You might even say Bartowski killed _both_ of our cars."

Sarah gave a brief, rueful chuckle.

"Yeah," Casey offered. _4.6 V8 engine. Hydro-glide transmission. Shiny._ "You never forget the good ones."

"Nicest car I ever had," Sarah said with a hint of wistfulness.

Casey stood up again. "Need a ride in?"

"Yeah," Sarah stood and followed Casey towards the courtyard exit. "Thanks, Casey."

"Eh. You should just requisition a new one. Something better."

Sarah shot Casey a playful look as they walked into the parking lot. "Are you saying my car wasn't good enough, Casey?"

"Maybe Beckman'll even call it a wedding present." Casey smirked at his own humor. Sarah just scoffed in response. "You know, I heard they're doing some great stuff with the new concealed missile launchers. Heat seeking now."

"Really?"

And for the first time that morning, a little hope crept into Sarah Walker's voice.

**xxx**


End file.
